i look at recently posted albums on facebook and i see all the aquaintances i've seen in the halls, in my classes. the ones i hear talking all the time, the loud ones who always have friends no matter where they are but nowhere in their constant gossiping do i hear word about where or when these pictures were taken. a curious feeling when i see them all together, a network of "cool?" kids. and they think they're so cool. underaged drinking in your basement while your parents are out of town , taking pictues of your wasted faces, posting them on facebook because apparently being illegal means being popular. yes i know i shouldn't be talking about illegal, but i dont post pictures of me and my friends where everyone can see them. i at least have a little shred of dignity left.
Don't give up. I'm only starting to see the gravity of your situation. the extent of your damnation. In short I don't blame you for your frivolous disposition. I blame myself for not being enough to change it. That came out wrong. I can't, nor do I want to, change you. I just wish I was insentive enough to make you wish to change. Or maybe change is non-existant. I want you to grow. You're playing a static and stagnant role whilst I am flourishing and thriving. I know I'm not the same as I was when we were first in love, but the change is amplified relative your inert stance. I've always cared about you, but that too has been altered by the hand of circumstance. I've known countless feelings for you, attachment, love, lust, caring, anguish, concern. I've always felt something for you. Now it's stronger than ever before. No more silly juvenile notions of "love". I care for you like a sister, a mother, a lover, a friend. You say you don...
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