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Owner of a broken heart, much better than an owner of a lonely heart

Is it better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all? This question has been asked so many times, by poets and cynics alike. Often there will be two groups with very different opinions which are based on their past experiences. For someone disillusioned by the subject of love, it is more than likely that they’ve had unfavourable experiences influencing their opinion. Broken hearts are quick to judge, hesitant to continue on that path of love because of a bump in the road. But in pulling off to the side and cutting their trip short they’ve put a premature end to all the things they could have experienced. We as people grow from the situations we are placed in based on our reactions to said situations. When placed into the circumstance of love, if we risk the broken hearts we have the opportunity to grow so much more than if we take the safe way out.

The cynics who’ve been hurt and broken by love’s throes would disagree. They are perfectly content, living in peaceful oblivion, safe from the danger of such a fallacious emotion as this. They portray love as a cunning enemy, luring them in like a siren’s call, releasing its havoc on its unsuspecting victims; a ticking time bomb that could explode at any moment, destroying the foundations meticulously built from a million dreams and memories. Why put so much effort into such an erratic situation? Heartbreak is surely inescapable and when it’s all said and done we’d come out the other end less of a person, having invested so much of ourselves only to lose it all. But what they don’t realize is in remaining a closed system for fear of loss, they’re really preventing gain.

Not having loved, we miss out on a whole new world, a whole new bond created with someone. And, illuminated in the glow of love’s light, we discover bits and pieces of ourselves that were hidden in the darkness of solitude. We become a more complete person. In the end, even if we’re left broken, incomplete, having given half our hearts away, we’ve still gained so much understanding. We’ve gained knowledge, not only about ourselves, but about the world around us. In life there are two choices: To take the treacherous mountain path or the safe and gentle valley trail. The mountainous road is for the adventurous and strong willed, for those who don’t mind danger when there’s a suitable reward. Once we’ve overcome the steep hills and the dangerous precipices, expended energy in climbing steep cliffs, risking a thousand ways to fall, all the effort is worth it on account of the view. As we stand on the peak of happiness, the world stretches out below us and we have been given a whole new perspective of life, with views never seen by those who were taken in by the safety of the valley path.

I believe that love is such a valuable and multifaceted emotion that everyone should experience it at one point in time. By that token you could say "Well, you're only so positive because you're obviously in love" And you'd only be half right. It's of no importance whether I am in love or not, my opinions are based on the past as well as the present, and engrained with a hope for the future. Being a poet I have works spanning over the years, spanning through many a good time as well as many a bad time. In my repertoire of poems you'll find both cynical and romantic outlooks on this subject, depending on where I stood, relationship-wise. But having looked at love from both sides now, I don't regret a thing. Although I've been burnt by love I wouldn't wish the sun to disappear because of a sunburn, because it sheds such a wondrous light, without it I'd be unaware of so much. Eventually the burn will turn into a tan; the pain from a broken heart will grow into strength and wisdom. We all grow through adversity, becoming stronger people because of it.

In conclusion, it is better to have loved and lost than to never have loved before. Because though by having lost the love we feel emptier than we did before it started, the truth is we’ve gained an incredible amount. We’ve gained a whole new perspective, a whole new outlook on the relationships we share. But there are still those who refuse, unable to let the muck of heartbreak to settle to the bottom of the clear pool or understanding. I hope for their sake they realize that even if, in the end, the love is lost, it doesn’t mean that hope is too.

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