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We have the opportunity to change our lives every day. It’s so easy to wallow in your self pity and think the world is out to get you. You recede into a dark little world where you’re only half there, where it’s hard to see the big picture and foresight is nearly impossible. It’s a safe haven where you don’t have to be responsible for your future; you just go with the flow and see where life takes you. Mostly you don’t get far. Eventually the odds will pile up against you and you’ll be stuck with nowhere to go. The longer you let yourself be pushed around by life’s injustice the deeper you dig your hole and the harder it will be to get out. Speaking from personal experience – from many experiences to be exact- you need to be responsible for your decisions and you need to know what you want out of life. Times will get you down, I know, because I’m down right now. The small things grow and grow till they affect many other unrelated aspects of your life. So you failed a math exam per say. Your parents would be mad; you’d feel inadequate and get mad at yourself as well. Depending on how you take control of your feelings, the problem could get worse or fade away. To use the overused cliché: “when life gives you lemons...” you just have to put things in perspective. It was only one math exam. Just study harder next time. Don’t believe that because you didn’t do so well on this certain unit that you won’t do well on anything else ever again. Yes I know that sounds drastic but I’ve seen it happen.
I once had a friend who lied to her parents. First off they don’t trust her anymore. But somehow she gets lucky and her parents understand what she’s going through and they’ve decided to tentatively let it slide. So the right think would have been to stop lying so she could regain their trust. And in a way she had, but there are still some things that you just can’t suddenly come clean about. In her case it was that the guy that she was going out with was 18 and a high school dropout. Not something you really want to tell your parents. One thing led to another and they grew suspicious. So she did what she though was right; she came clean. This was the proverbial straw that broke the camel’s back. Her parents felt betrayed that she’d continued to lie to them even after they’d been so understanding of her. By this time she was feeling like she couldn’t do anything right and that the world was out to get her. But she didn’t give up, and I admired that. She knew that this was just a rough patch and over time it would smooth over. Perseverance and foresight are two commendable traits in life, as she soon discovered. If you have the will then nothing is impossible. Like a junky who decides to clean up his act and change his life around, or a dancer who followed her dream, no matter how unachievable it seemed.
It would have been so easy to give up and declare it hopeless, but no good can come from that. Once you discover this then life can easily be changed. Its scary, to realize the obscene freedom we have in directing our own lives. To discover that no one else can step in and make decisions for us. Complete self reliance is a sure fast way to figure out your capacity in directing your life. Riding the coat tails of those around you never amounts to anything worthwhile.

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