your eyes looked hauntingly familiar. i felt like you were pulling me in to some secret. begging me to understand something. you sat down and i though little of you, but those eyes kept boring into me. they saw something more than what strangers would let on to knowing. you saw what we were for what we were. never give up on love. be happy because that is everything. you knew we loved eachother. you called me attractive and you called him handsome. it could have been nothing, a drunkard's attempt at a compliment, but i thought you sensed something more, the way i did. i reached and held his hand and you smiled at us with an unplaceable emotion. you mumbled to yourself and i tried to reply but i couldnt summon the words. i was mutely bewildered, touched by the momentary joint in our three worlds. the countless faces i pass by without a second thought, what ocean of new ideas could i witness, what array of insight could be mine? anyones? we went our ways and you went yours. you said one last thing. thanks for your eyes. i realized later it didn't mean nearly as much as i though it had. he stared into his eyes and i thought he could see what i've seen. the beauty that's behind it. and i'll never really know.
Don't give up. I'm only starting to see the gravity of your situation. the extent of your damnation. In short I don't blame you for your frivolous disposition. I blame myself for not being enough to change it. That came out wrong. I can't, nor do I want to, change you. I just wish I was insentive enough to make you wish to change. Or maybe change is non-existant. I want you to grow. You're playing a static and stagnant role whilst I am flourishing and thriving. I know I'm not the same as I was when we were first in love, but the change is amplified relative your inert stance. I've always cared about you, but that too has been altered by the hand of circumstance. I've known countless feelings for you, attachment, love, lust, caring, anguish, concern. I've always felt something for you. Now it's stronger than ever before. No more silly juvenile notions of "love". I care for you like a sister, a mother, a lover, a friend. You say you don...
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