you've unnecessarily repeated it enough times for me to grasp the simple concept that you don't think highly of him at all. I get it. I understand where you're coming from. I also understand that I can't get him a job or get him a place. but I can be here for him no matter what. I'll stay by his side because my presence is more than he could ask for. You won't understand what he means to me, and I don't expect you to ever comprehend it..
Don't give up. I'm only starting to see the gravity of your situation. the extent of your damnation. In short I don't blame you for your frivolous disposition. I blame myself for not being enough to change it. That came out wrong. I can't, nor do I want to, change you. I just wish I was insentive enough to make you wish to change. Or maybe change is non-existant. I want you to grow. You're playing a static and stagnant role whilst I am flourishing and thriving. I know I'm not the same as I was when we were first in love, but the change is amplified relative your inert stance. I've always cared about you, but that too has been altered by the hand of circumstance. I've known countless feelings for you, attachment, love, lust, caring, anguish, concern. I've always felt something for you. Now it's stronger than ever before. No more silly juvenile notions of "love". I care for you like a sister, a mother, a lover, a friend. You say you don...
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