some one help me, i'm drowning. thoughts pool my mind and its getting hard to breathe. the room is twitching, creeping from the corners of my eyes. emotions are entangling with eachother, i've lost myself. i'm tied here by my own pretences. wondering waiting worrying. what's worth fighing, living for? everything that makes me happy is eating me up inside. i will be an empty shell of humanity. all the easier for you to fill me up with your own beliefs of what i should be. so many questions thrust upon me all of a sudden, i cant cope i can't focus. is it my glasses or is it me? i cant see. the floor is spinning. i feel sick with it's motion. my senses are dead from over-exposure. my touch is numb my voice is hollow. what's the point? is there even one?
I feel like somewhere along my life there was a shift. Suddenly nothing was for fun any more, it was all necessary. Suddenly I'm bothering with what others think, afraid to link any connotations I deem negative to my being. Why do I care what people I've never met, who'll forget they ever saw me, think of me; this obscure stranger in their peripherals. It's a warped sense of mind and place, seeing the space around me in my mind's made up ways. So I stray away from everyone, isolating myself unwittingly, turning them against me. Self fulfilling prophecies, I succeed in creating this reality. I need to break free from my mind's mentalities, with which negativity has propelled me. So I've started a new sport. I call it neighborhood night dancing. Donning headphones and heading out alone to the empty streets as the city sleeps, and moving to the beat. Letting it compel me towards a freedom long gone missing. Letting go is an art. Complete release is a tough ...
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