everybody's dream can fall apart

the tables have turned, my mask is broken.
killed by love
i silently curse the labels i placed on that feeling.
i never really wanted to belong.
i thought it was different.
the way i feel now shows that i'm not.

I got a longer fall, a longer fall to take

Cause I'm a bigger fool with a bigger heart to break

i'm empty, distrought. my heart is unwell.

funny.

each chapter unfolds and the past dies away.
yet the pain's still the same all through the day.

there's so much on my mind.

i believe i've cursed myself.

i have no hope for the future.

no belief that i will somehow end victorious.

no.

its all over now, baby blue..

i want to build a self sustainable cabin and live there in my own way. i have no want at all for the way of man. i dont want money i dont want your material life supports. give me peace of mind and nature's way and i will be happy.

Comments

pihzaz said…

im in the tech centre and your in art

we so close but so far away i havent talked to you in a long time

November 13, 2008 at 9:55 AM

teardas

this is the reason i broke up with him in the first place. because it was so much stress and it just seemed hopeless. i know that's a harsh word but its true. he's got so much on his plate and i dont want any more on mine. i have my own set of worries i need to take care of. but i cant just turn him away. the way he opened up to me...it litteraly moved me to tears. i feel his dispair, his depression. he has nothing. but i dont want him to have no one too. at the moment i feel thats all i can do; give him the comfort of knowing that i'm here for him, that he has me. contrairy to his beleifs he hasnt lost me. if he really had, i wouldnt have seen him yestrerday, or tuesday, or any times before that. we wouldnt have acted or talked the way we did if he'd truley lost me. his words stung because i felt his pain through them. his feelings soaking the words and turning them a different colour. i never told him to get the fuck out of my life, but it hurt to know thats how he fe

I wish I could

I'm a moon person too. But I'm too caught up in my petty securities and routines to wander the streets at night

neighborhood nights

I feel like somewhere along my life there was a shift. Suddenly nothing was for fun any more, it was all necessary. Suddenly I'm bothering with what others think, afraid to link any connotations I deem negative to my being. Why do I care what people I've never met, who'll forget they ever saw me, think of me; this obscure stranger in their peripherals. It's a warped sense of mind and place, seeing the space around me in my mind's made up ways. So I stray away from everyone, isolating myself unwittingly, turning them against me. Self fulfilling prophecies, I succeed in creating this reality. I need to break free from my mind's mentalities, with which negativity has propelled me. So I've started a new sport. I call it neighborhood night dancing. Donning headphones and heading out alone to the empty streets as the city sleeps, and moving to the beat. Letting it compel me towards a freedom long gone missing. Letting go is an art. Complete release is a tough

rude awakenings

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